Senior year has a strange way of making spaces that felt ordinary become more important. Hallways at school, your favorite coffee spot, and other places you spent tons of time in that didn’t seem worth noticing are slowly drifting farther from you. These small pieces of your childhood outside of your home that were part of your routine and a stable place for you are hard to replace, and make for a unexpectedly hard goodbye.
I grew up swimming. For over 12 years, I started or ended my day with swim practice. The same coaches, the same pools, and the same teammates. My coaches and friends were my second family. Without realizing it, they were definitely some of the most influential people in my life. The pool was also a stable place for me; if I had a hard day at school or my mom and dad were bugging me over grades at home, I knew I would always have swim practice to escape the hard parts of my day.
As I got older my everyday life changed. Stressing over what colleges I had heard back from, if I was going to get a job, or friend group drama, I still always had the pool. Although not all of my memories at the pool are happy, the hard sets were what took my mind off of anything going on outside of there. Staring at the blue line on the bottom of the pool and focusing on my breath was the only thing I could think about while swimming and became my version of therapy. Towards the end of my senior season, it started to hit me that soon I would be loosing one of the most consistent parts of my life, not just the activity and the people but also the place. The pool and swim practice was my 3rd space. It provided me neutral ground and time to reflect.
After ending swimming I didn’t think it would be possible to replace the pool and how it served me. I don’t think I ever will find a replacement as good as it, but a very close second place would be “Kpower yoga.” My mom has been going there since the day they opened. Whenever she wasn’t at home or work, it was a safe bet to say she was at yoga.
I never understood what yoga was until I tried it. It wasn’t just stretching but was also a way to clear your mind, move your body, and challenge yourself. I started going to yoga sculpt. Sculpt has heat, weights, cardio, and stretching all in one class. I started finding Kpower to be a sacred place for me to honor my mind and body. It is perfect for me; it makes my body feel strong and since it is so hard it helps me clear my mind. Something about focusing on keeping up with the pace of the music and breathing through the heat provides peace to my mind, comparable to swimming.
When the opportunity to become an instructor came my way I immediately jumped into it. While doing my teacher training I was spending 12+ hours per week in the studio. It became a safe and stable place to me. It was the place I always went to after the highest highs like qualifying for swimming state or the lowest lows like going straight to YTT after I shot super bad at golf sections. When I became an official instructor and started teaching classes there, the dynamic shifted to be more community oriented to me. I get to meet and become close with all kinds of people from retired grandmas who have been coming for years to students at St Ben’s. All of these people have their own story to tell and shows how one room can bring 20+ people together. My coworkers and other ladies I did my training and certification with became trusted people. Since I started so young, I feel blessed to have all of my coworkers who serve as role-models for me.
One of the most special part of Kpower is I get to share the experience with my mom. Since my mom has been going for years, I sometimes am referred to as “Rebeck’s daughter” and I really don’t mind it. It is the best gift to have a mom like her, without her I would never have gotten a space as special as Kpower or even the opportunity to teach there. Kpower has served as a 3rd space for me and although I leave for college soon it will always be a place I can be welcomed back to with open arms. Not just from my bosses but from other members as well.
Having a third space “taken” from you is hard and its likely you don’t understand it’s happening until you don’t have it anymore. This is why taking time to reflect on what serves you and fills your cup is important. 3rd spaces are beneficial for mental health as well, they give you community, belonging, and neutral ground.
